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  #1  
Old July 11th, 2005, 11:07 AM
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Tribute To The 'Nice Guys'

A friend sent me this...

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girls every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once theyre at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow dont end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldnt worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree youd ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didnt have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing serious between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: oh, but were just friends! And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because youre nice like that.

The nice guys dont often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys dont seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I cant. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as oh, hes too nice to date or he would be a good boyfriend but hes not for me or he already puts up with so much from me, I couldnt possibly ask him out! or the most frustrating of all: no, it would ruin our friendship. Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I cant figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (Im going to sleep with this complete *** now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesnt last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know youre sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.
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ryjyd agrees: see below...
kicken agrees: sounds like the story of my life

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  #2  
Old July 11th, 2005, 11:16 AM
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too...much...text... can someone read that and tell me if it's good?
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  #3  
Old July 11th, 2005, 11:29 AM
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Ironically enough green day came on my mp3 player as I clicked this link...

Summary:
1.) Girl says she wants nice guy
2.) Girl has a nice guy around
3.) Nice guy puts up with Girls st*ff
4.) Girl finds reason/excuse not to have nice guy
5.) Girl dates/sleeps with asshole
6.) Nice guy there to pick up the pieces
7.) Girl complains to guy about the lack of nice guys out there
8.) Nice guy smiles, nods, puts up with her st*uff
9.) Goto 1 until nice guy snaps

Basically the standard high school/college nice guy complaint that he doesn't get laid more than your typical stuck up asshole....

-MBirchmeier
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jmeeter agrees!
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Old July 11th, 2005, 11:30 AM
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Basically it said, nice guys finish last, but not forever. Oh yeah, and he is paying tribute to the nice guys.
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  #5  
Old July 11th, 2005, 11:43 AM
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I wanted someone to know this... I think this thread might be the most appropriate...

I've been the nice guy for quite some time. I have spent that time listening to the agonizing details, attempting to dissolve whatever dramatically overinflated BS comes, and have been passed over time and again... I have done my time, and had release within the last month where the nice guy came in first.

A red-headed bombshell who treats me well and takes care of my every need has come to rescue me from all of these horrible acts of selective blindness. I played the part of the nice guy to her, and she just turned and looked, and in a matter of fact voice, told me that she finally figured out who she wanted to be with. I haven't felt like this in years, if ever, and it feels good. I watch as she gets hit on again and again and again and everyone is shot down rather blatantly and brutally for me, the nice guy. That feels damn good...

If I'm sounding full of sugary sweetness thick enough to cause a diabetic coma... nah, I'm love-struck. She puts me in a good mood like that. illEATurHARTout... thanks... and yes, your time will come, too...
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bcyde agrees: Good job. I was in the same boat, now am coming up on our 8th anniversary of dating (2nd year of
marriage).
kicken agrees: congrats
jmeeter agrees!
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  #6  
Old July 11th, 2005, 12:24 PM
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Here, here! (but where's the liquor? I want a drink, damnit!) After literally years of "but you're like my best friend" and "I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship" (so much for that, eh?), I finally found an awesome woman who in ten months will become my wife. While I do look back and think "why was I so stupid to put up with that crap", the wait has been very worth it. Here's to the nice guys that finish first, and keep up the spirits of our brothers who haven't been discovered yet!
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bdreyer agrees: Congrats... marriage ROCKS!
compmodder26 agrees: Brilliant!!!
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  #7  
Old July 11th, 2005, 01:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sepodati
too...much...text... can someone read that and tell me if it's good?


TLDR version:
Nice guys put up with a bunch of crap in the hopes that girls will wake up from wanting a bad boy, but they rarely do so all nice guys unite and give each other props.


As much as I was a "nice guy" (still a nice guy, but haven't been single for a while), I have to say there's a huge difference between being a nice guy, and waiting around for a girl to wake up to you if you're not taking the chance to make your feelings known. I've been both, and getting rejected is way better than not knowing because you're too scared of getting rejected.
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Last edited by bcyde : July 11th, 2005 at 02:00 PM.

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  #8  
Old July 11th, 2005, 04:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ryjyd
I wanted someone to know this... I think this thread might be the most appropriate...

I've been the nice guy for quite some time. I have spent that time listening to the agonizing details, attempting to dissolve whatever dramatically overinflated BS comes, and have been passed over time and again... I have done my time, and had release within the last month where the nice guy came in first.

A red-headed bombshell who treats me well and takes care of my every need has come to rescue me from all of these horrible acts of selective blindness. I played the part of the nice guy to her, and she just turned and looked, and in a matter of fact voice, told me that she finally figured out who she wanted to be with. I haven't felt like this in years, if ever, and it feels good. I watch as she gets hit on again and again and again and everyone is shot down rather blatantly and brutally for me, the nice guy. That feels damn good...

If I'm sounding full of sugary sweetness thick enough to cause a diabetic coma... nah, I'm love-struck. She puts me in a good mood like that. illEATurHARTout... thanks... and yes, your time will come, too...
You're welcome. :-)

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  #9  
Old July 11th, 2005, 08:31 PM
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What a hoot. Obvious contridictions in the narrative aside, what do you 'nice guys' expect? What isn't obvious about 'Most women aren't attracted to doormat men'? Honestly, you'd think a guy without a backbone was what you (meaning the self proclaimed nice guys) thought women really wanted. Just to make sure we're all on the same page... there ARE more than two types of men. You (meaning men in general) come in more varieties than a$$hole and doormat. But given those as the only choices, sorry, usually the jerk looks like more fun.

Here's a hint: The next time you're around a woman, rather you're dating or not, and she asks what you want to do, don't say, "I dunno, what do you want to do?" Pick something to do, and make it a fun experience for both of you. Having fun with someone is going to lead to enjoyable sex for both parties more often than you hanging around department store dressing rooms waiting for a woman that treats you like dirt.

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Old July 11th, 2005, 09:53 PM
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Agreed. The problem with nice guys is that they're inviting themselves to become dumping grounds, not just with women, but with life in general. They're easy to take advantage of, too meek to retaliate when it happens, and too "nice" to stand up and take their piece of the pie.

So.. surprise, surprise, they get taken advantage of again and again and don't get their fair share of life.

There's a difference between being an upright and honorable man and being a doormat. Whine all they want, but doormats generally do finish last because that's where they put themselves, not because they got some unfair shake.
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hope.sandoval agrees: Yes! You get it.
SimonGreenhill agrees: Long time no see!
jmeeter disagrees!

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Old July 11th, 2005, 09:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hope.sandoval
What a hoot. Obvious contridictions in the narrative aside, what do you 'nice guys' expect? What isn't obvious about 'Most women aren't attracted to doormat men'? Honestly, you'd think a guy without a backbone was what you (meaning the self proclaimed nice guys) thought women really wanted. Just to make sure we're all on the same page... there ARE more than two types of men. You (meaning men in general) come in more varieties than a$$hole and doormat. But given those as the only choices, sorry, usually the jerk looks like more fun.

Here's a hint: The next time you're around a woman, rather you're dating or not, and she asks what you want to do, don't say, "I dunno, what do you want to do?" Pick something to do, and make it a fun experience for both of you. Having fun with someone is going to lead to enjoyable sex for both parties more often than you hanging around department store dressing rooms waiting for a woman that treats you like dirt.
Either somebody's trying to be a pity-party-pooper, of they've had one too many "a$$holes" along the way. I especially loved how the "doormat" stereotype was pointed out and rejected, yet the same stereotype was used in the generalization. Glad to see someone's standing up for the "shallow female" population.

The "nice guy" we are lauding in this thread is not your so-called doormat. These nice guys are not single because of a lack of trying, bad timing (though that's a BIG culprit in many broken hearts), nor because they allow a woman to walk all over them. These nice guys have feelings, understand that women do too, and want to connect on a level higher than "enjoyable sex" (though good sex is always a plus).

I have personally played a range of roles in past relationships (and non-relationships). I've done everything from letting the girl pick the place (being in a new town requires such things), being the forward gentleman who is good for a laugh and a fun time (though somehow still better a friend than a boyfriend), and I even tried the a$$hole approach (which worked up until I realized it wasn't ME). Now that I'm just me, look where I am. I am a good listener, a shoulder to cry on, a fun time, good for a laugh, and engaged to an amazing woman who is everything to me.

But before I throw more mush on this than it deserves, "Here's a hint:" Remember that you don't have to treat your "doormat" like dirt. Next time you're spilling your guts to a close guy-friend that you may be interested in, tell him you want to get to know him better and ask what he's doing that weekend--don't ask him out, just imply you're interested. Remember that he doesn't necessarily know what you enjoy doing besides crying to him, so don't expect him to pick something that you'd both enjoy (but he wants to get to know you better so that he can pick something nice/fun/etc.). And yes, if he doesn't take the bait, then too bad for him. (Note too "doormat" guys: TAKE THE BAIT!)

I await more "nice guy" bashing.

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Old July 11th, 2005, 10:12 PM
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this thread is actualy funny, but yet 99.9% of the time true.

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Old July 11th, 2005, 10:24 PM
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Haha. I knew someone wouldn't get it. I'm not surprised. Read CTB's post, he's a very bizarre clown, but he understands.

BTW, I thought the shallow factor was established with the original post.

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Old July 11th, 2005, 10:31 PM
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Originally Posted by hope.sandoval
Haha. I knew someone wouldn't get it. I'm not surprised. Read CTB's post, he's a very bizarre clown, but he understands.

BTW, I thought the shallow factor was established with the original post.
hopefully that was not ment for me, because im in the same boat as what users are talking about in this thread... the funny part is how users express to it

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  #15  
Old July 11th, 2005, 10:36 PM
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Kokoro Kokoro is offline
long time no see :)
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About time the nice guys got some recognition!
A toast to you nice guys out there! May you continue using up your cellphone minutes to satisfy the opposite gender's worry about what apparel they'll wear to a party you weren't invited to! *bows to the nice guys*
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