Tribute To The 'Nice Guys'

A friend sent me this...

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete *** now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

too...much...text... can someone read that and tell me if it's good?

Ironically enough green day came on my mp3 player as I clicked this link...

Summary:
1.) Girl says she wants nice guy
2.) Girl has a nice guy around
3.) Nice guy puts up with Girls st*ff
4.) Girl finds reason/excuse not to have nice guy
5.) Girl dates/sleeps with asshole
6.) Nice guy there to pick up the pieces
7.) Girl complains to guy about the lack of nice guys out there
8.) Nice guy smiles, nods, puts up with her st*uff
9.) Goto 1 until nice guy snaps

Basically the standard high school/college nice guy complaint that he doesn't get laid more than your typical stuck up asshole....

-MBirchmeier

Basically it said, nice guys finish last, but not forever. Oh yeah, and he is paying tribute to the nice guys.

I wanted someone to know this... I think this thread might be the most appropriate...

I've been the nice guy for quite some time. I have spent that time listening to the agonizing details, attempting to dissolve whatever dramatically overinflated BS comes, and have been passed over time and again... I have done my time, and had release within the last month where the nice guy came in first.

A red-headed bombshell who treats me well and takes care of my every need has come to rescue me from all of these horrible acts of selective blindness. I played the part of the nice guy to her, and she just turned and looked, and in a matter of fact voice, told me that she finally figured out who she wanted to be with. I haven't felt like this in years, if ever, and it feels good. I watch as she gets hit on again and again and again and everyone is shot down rather blatantly and brutally for me, the nice guy. That feels damn good...

If I'm sounding full of sugary sweetness thick enough to cause a diabetic coma... nah, I'm love-struck. She puts me in a good mood like that. illEATurHARTout... thanks... and yes, your time will come, too...

Here, here! (but where's the liquor? I want a drink, damnit!) After literally years of "but you're like my best friend" and "I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship" (so much for that, eh?), I finally found an awesome woman who in ten months will become my wife. While I do look back and think "why was I so stupid to put up with that crap", the wait has been very worth it. Here's to the nice guys that finish first, and keep up the spirits of our brothers who haven't been discovered yet!

TLDR version:
Nice guys put up with a bunch of crap in the hopes that girls will wake up from wanting a bad boy, but they rarely do so all nice guys unite and give each other props.


As much as I was a "nice guy" (still a nice guy, but haven't been single for a while), I have to say there's a huge difference between being a nice guy, and waiting around for a girl to wake up to you if you're not taking the chance to make your feelings known. I've been both, and getting rejected is way better than not knowing because you're too scared of getting rejected.

You're welcome. :-)

What a hoot. Obvious contridictions in the narrative aside, what do you 'nice guys' expect? What isn't obvious about 'Most women aren't attracted to doormat men'? Honestly, you'd think a guy without a backbone was what you (meaning the self proclaimed nice guys) thought women really wanted. Just to make sure we're all on the same page... there ARE more than two types of men. You (meaning men in general) come in more varieties than a$$hole and doormat. But given those as the only choices, sorry, usually the jerk looks like more fun.

Here's a hint: The next time you're around a woman, rather you're dating or not, and she asks what you want to do, don't say, "I dunno, what do you want to do?" Pick something to do, and make it a fun experience for both of you. Having fun with someone is going to lead to enjoyable sex for both parties more often than you hanging around department store dressing rooms waiting for a woman that treats you like dirt.

Agreed. The problem with nice guys is that they're inviting themselves to become dumping grounds, not just with women, but with life in general. They're easy to take advantage of, too meek to retaliate when it happens, and too "nice" to stand up and take their piece of the pie.

So.. surprise, surprise, they get taken advantage of again and again and don't get their fair share of life.

There's a difference between being an upright and honorable man and being a doormat. Whine all they want, but doormats generally do finish last because that's where they put themselves, not because they got some unfair shake.