Connection refused

Sorry for my totally green question:
I'm trying to connect to my MySQL database from another host but it fails, so I thought i'd see if MySQL is responding at all:

$ telnet my_mysql_host 3306
Trying xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx...
telnet: Unable to connect to remote host: Connection refused

Ok, so I've disabled telnet connections, which is a good thing

So how do I open this port for specific hosts?

that's because you're trying to connect to your mysql db from another host.


on your mysql server do

mysql -u root

then add a row for root with hostname = to %

% means from anywhere so now you can log from anywhere and not only localhost

I must be a total idiot, i can't get this thing to work.

Ok, MySQL is listening and anwering now!
But i can't connect! All I get is:
Host '213.114.155.18' is not allowed to connect to this MySQL server

Here's what i did:
GRANT ALL PRIVILEGES ON medter.* TO 'sekreren'@'213.114.155.%' IDENTIFIED BY PASSWORD '********';
FLUSH PRIVILEGES;

What is wrong?